Betty Hunts Mr Gove

Hello Hupeople!  Betty Badger here again.

I had such an exciting day yesterday with Security Humen, Horses, Police and Mr Gove.  But it was nearly a disaster when I turned up at DEFRA to find that Mr Gove and many of his staff had left their sett!  Fortunately one of my fans, a DEFRA Mole, told me where Mr Gove was hiding so I trundled along the busy West Minster streets trying not to get run over. Being run over is an occupational hazard for us Badger Folk.


This is a Mole 

As you can see, Moles like eating worms and digging too.  To be honest, it wasn't this kind of Mole that told me about Mr Gove's new sett, but I don't want to get that Huperson into trouble...


Anyway, Mr Gove's new sett is in the Seacold Building which is at 2 Marsham Street.  It is a huge building with lots of coloured glass that makes the ground pretty colours when the sun shines on it .  It has a front entrance that has Security Humen who don't like Badgers so they sent me away.  Here is a picture:


I felt very sad to be rejected but I wandered around the corner and found the staff entrance.  What a find!

The Seacold Buding is shared with The Home Office so there are lots and lots of Hupeople coming in and out.  Also it is a very busy street and lots of Hupeople passed by and many of them stopped to talk and take my picture.  Clearly the Home office staff haven't yet been told "Don't Engage with the Badger!"  And I saw some of my old friends from Smith Square who laughed and said how clever I was to track them down; they were very pleased to see me.

The security is very tight at 2 Marsham Street and the Security staff are not at all friendly.  They definitely don't like Badgers.   In fact they called the Police and along rode 2 Huwomen on Horses and they began to question me.  The Horse questions were easy to answer as all Horses really care about is grass.  The Police Huwmen wanted to know what I was doing and was I going to bring any friends.  I reassured them that I was harmless and alone and they told their radios that I was "non-confrontational" and not worth worrying about.   Here they all are:

I resigned myself to not seeing Mr Gove today as I guessed he would be using the Ministerial Entrance,  but how wrong I was.  He came along at around 2 pm looking very tired after a hard morning in Parliament sitting with Mrs Rudd.  I was so excited and called out "Oh, I've found you!" and he gave me a nice big wave. 

I met so many kind people today.  I met a beautiful Huwoman who told me she is a Vegan and doesn't harm any Animals including Badgers.  She took my picture too.  I met a couple of Humen in blue suits who stopped and listened to my story about the Badger Kill Cull.  They said they would try to help me. I met Humen Cubs on their way to play games like cricket and tennis. I didn't get too tired standing up today because I had so much fun.  I am so glad that I can tell all the Hupeople in the Home Office about how cruel some of the DEFRA Hupeople are.  Perhaps they will help me to stop the killing; I do hope so for the sake of the 50,000 Badger Folk who might die this Autumn.

I just want to tell you about some other things.  I didn't know that Hupeople lived underground but I often see them in Pimlico Train Station.  They make very impressive tunnels  I guess that makes them very tired which is why they are always asleep; here is one of the Hupeople who lives in Pimlico tunnel.  

Some of you might not realise that there is a section on the end of each BLog where you can write a comment.  Well, one of my biggest fans called Tom often writes a comment and last week he wrote me a poem.  As you probably haven't looked at the comment section I thought that it deserved to be seen by more people as it is so nice.  In fact it made me blush and cry a bit...

For Betty

the Ground of All Being,
ran the forest track
on four broad paws.

the Wisdom of the Universe
found expression
In her aerodynamic form

the Life of the Cosmos
pulsed
in her beating heart, her pounding paws and joyful breath

the Moonlight
straked her head
finding her way

to the Sett deep in Earth
where Warmth and Love
enveloped her.

How can I follow that?  Well just to say that I broke the ticket machine in the station today by putting Mary's Debit card in the slot meant for money notes.  I was so embarrassed...

See? Badgers are both Divine and silly; a great way to be!

Night Night 

Betty 🐾🐾.

Betty goes Dating

Hello Lovely Hupeople!  Betty here again.  

What an exciting day I had on Thursday.  I made a new friend on the Internet Face Book, I went dating to a Badger Sett and I went to DEFRA. And Mary didn't lose her temper once....

I didn't see Mr Gove today because he was busy talking with Mrs May about a war with Russia.  Here is a picture of Mrs May and Mr Putin from the Daily Express.  



They both look very tired.  I really think Hupeople are very strange.  We Badgers have been living in Britain since the Ice Age and we have never had a war.... although, just now I wouldn't mind taking revenge on the Chief Vet and some Civil Servants who clearly hate  us Badger Folk.

Today so many lovely DEFRA civil servants said Hello and waved at me, even though they are not allowed to "Engage with the Badger".  One Human said, "Don't be downhearted Betty- you are doing an important job".  Another nice Huperson said "Don't give up Betty".  At least six Hupeople whispered "We are on your Side".  One Huwoman loved my cub Bud because he has red fur like her.  This is a ginger Badger.

Lots of people took my photos today and one of them called Stewart sent Mary his picture of me and he is now my Friend on the the Internet Face Book thing, although I am not really sure what that is.  Mary told me that it is a way of communicating using words and pictures over long distances without talking or grunting.  I wonder if the Face Book uses smells too?  We Badgers know a lot through smells. Here is Stewart's picture. Apparently he is very good at taking pictures; Mary called him an Expert :

I was invited to meet  a new Badger family last night and I thought it might be a good idea for Mr Gove to meet some Badgers too as he has probably never seen a live one- most Hupeople have only seen dead ones run over by cars.   Anyway, I invited him over a week ago to go along with me last night and I was quite hopeful that he would go, but then while I was at DEFRA, Mary got an email from his Personal Secretary saying he couldn't make it because he had another appointment. This sounds hopeful to me so I will invite him again in the summer when the cubs will be big enough to meet him.  I am inviting other Conservatory MPs too, including Mrs Anne Main who likes Badgers and Mr Grant Shapps who doesn't. We will have so much fun.

Oh and I made a new sign to hang outside DEFRA.  It has 3 words  (VACCINATE NOT EXTERMINATE) but 2 of them are very hard words so Mary helped me to spell them: 

Anyway I went to see the Badger family along with my Hupeople friends including Chris and Frank and Elizabeth and her mate and Duke who is a famous musician who has made a song and video about Badgers and Tom who is the lovely kind Human who writes all the supportive and clever comments at the end of most of my blogs.  I think Mary was trying to find me a new mate since Brian was killed in the Kill Cull. It was nice to meet soem new Badger friends and although one of them called Butch was quite handsome, I am still grieving for Brian. Elizabeth sent me some pictures of the Badger family we met :

Did you know that some of the DEFRA staff are being moved out of Smith Square and along to Marsham Street?  What is a Badger to do?  I can't be in 2 places at once.. I wonder how much that is costing the tax payer.  Still, the Government has loads of money since it has already cost  over  £23 Million in 4 years up to 2016 to kill 10,800 of my Badger friends.  That is £1,500 per dead Badger.  If I were clever I would be able to tell you how many nurses that would employ for the NHS. Lots anyway. Did you know that last autumn DEFRA spent £500,000 on radios for the men with flash-bang sticks who were killing my Badger friends in the in the west country?  

In 2017 they killed nearly 20,000 Badger folk but they are not revealing how much that cost, and this Autumn they want to kill 50,000 of us.  They are pretending to consult the public, but we all know what the outcome will be....

But you, my friends, know that this is not just a waste of money that could be used to save lives, but is destroying beautiful creatures, us Badgers, who are not responsible for the death of Cattle.  The farmers are responsible for the death of Cows and Badgers because some of them are just too stupid to see that they are moving cattle and disease around the country to make profits. 

Mary and I are both very sad now because Mary just found a new Government document just published on the Internet all about the Badger Cull. Mary is putting a link in here  Research Briefing     It clearly says that "The Government's policy is that Badger Culling should play a role in the Control of bTB". They promised they would review that but they are not.

WHY WHY WHY?

They talk about us Badgers as if we are just waste materials. We Badgers like to play and mate and have cubs and eat worms and groom and dig holes. We have a right to live out our lives without Hupeople destroying us because they are too stupid to vaccinate Cows and stop moving sick Cows around the country.

I am not sure I want anything else to do with Hupeople....  I will sleep on it

Night night,

Betty  🐾🐾

Betty has a big secret!

Hello Hupeople! 

Betty Badger here.  I didn't get to Downing Street after all because when I  popped along to DEFRA for a quick visit I discovered that Mr Gove was working and not on his holidays.  And there was so much going on! 

The first exciting thing was that a bunch of Huwomen from a group called 38 Degrees were delivering Mr Gove a huge painted plastic bottle to thank him for agreeing to bring in a deposit scheme on plastic bottles.  When I saw him later and he said hello we had a quick chat and I congratulated him on the bottle deposit thing which will, apparently, save the world.  I am sure it will be very complicated to administer; he is probably hoping that the Labour Party will get in before he has to do that, then they will look silly when if it goes wrong.  Here is Mr Gove having what is called "a photo opportunity"




Do you notice Mr Gove is not as smart as usual.  He was wearing his country clothes with his brown trousers.. probably getting ready to go down to his place in Surrey for the Easter Holidays.

As the 38 Degrees Huwomen were leaving we spoke about the Badger Kill and I asked them to make getting rid of the Badger Kill Cull their next mission.  They seemed very sympathetic.

I have a BIG SECRET to share with you.  I have heard through the grapevine that Mr Gove has on his desk a picture- not of his wife or his family, or of Mrs May, but of a Badger!  I wonder if it is a picture of me Betty Badger!!!  I think that, perhaps, he really loves Badgers and he likes to remember us.  However, when I am feeling sad, I believe that the DEFRA staff who hate badgers have instructed him to stare at the badger picture for a minute every hour and chant, "I hate Badgers, Badgers are Evil, Badgers spread disease.." over and over again to brainwash himself. 

Mr Gove had lots of meetings but eventually he came down to his shiny car and I asked him to focus now on ending the Badger Kill.  I do wonder if he listens.

Here is a picture I took on the way from Pimlico  today just to remind you that Spring is coming:  

After Mr Gove left along came a Huwoman with short dark hair, who looked like she had been eating lemons, like the lady last week, and she shouted "Cattle are Innocent". But she wouldn't talk to me about the issues and ran off in through the DEFRA door.  She did break the rules and "Engage with the Badger" but not in a way that would help her to learn the truth.

Another exciting thing happened when yet another Huwoman came and spoke to me and I noticed that we were wearing the dame scarf.  She said she got hers in Monsoon which Is a posh shop but I think Mary got mine in M&S sale.  I complimented her on her excellent taste.  She was also lovely and kind. 

Here is me in my scarf:

Something else really important happened this week.  Mary took me to a meeting of her Badger Group.   Mary didn't cry this time because the speaker had some good and optimistic News. (Mary does cry a lot- she is soft hearted) He was Professor Malcolm Bennett of Nottingham University who has been carrying out DEFRA funded research on dead Badgers and Cows. His research has shown that the movement of Cattle from areas with TB, such as The West Country, into TB free areas such as Derbyshire causes the spread of TB to Cattle to those areas !  Even a badger could work that out and we are not very bright.  So in Derbyshire they have found TB in Cattle but NOT in Badgers.  Of course, we Badgers might get it off the Cows and then get blamed for spreading it to Cattle and then they will kill us. However, science is on the Badgers' side.  The type of TB in Derbyshire Cows has been shown to come from The West Country so, unless Badgers can fly across the country they cannot blame us. 

The same thing happened when Cows came over from Ireland to Scotland- they brought Irish TB with them,  Even Irish Badgers cannot swim across the sea....

Mary has been spent much of the day at her computer filling in DEFRA forms replying to Defra consultations about killing Badgers in lots more areas such as Berkshire and Hertfordshire where there is a very low risk of TB.  I found her very boring today but I know she is doing important work, so I went out to play with the cubs who are getting very big.  The sun came out and we enjoyed  watching the buds beginning to burst.  If you sit still for long enough and are very quiet you can see and hear them open.  Horse Chestnut trees are especially noisy with their sticky buds.  This is a Horse Chestnut tree I met today.

Time to go now.  I will go down to DEFRA again on Thursday and try to talk to Mr Gove about the new research.  Wish me luck.

Night Night,

🐾🐾  Betty

Betty gets into Trouble

Sorry I have been quiet for a while but your friendly Betty and her Huwoman friend Mary have been quite depressed about the lack of publicity about the Badger Killing planned for this year.  Still, we have carried on visiting DEFRA on the last 2 Thursdays and we have had some fun.  Last Thursday was exciting because we met a Human with a Badger in a bag, we got into trouble and a nice Human offered to adopt one of my Cubs. 

As you can see we brought the Cubs and a few of their friends:

We have been making full use of Mary's stool and there has been some fighting over it to keep our paws off the cold wet ground.  I enjoyed some climbing up DEFRA's walls

Mary put up her new sign we made the morning before we left, but it wasn't a very good sign because Badgers are not very good at spelling and I have to admit that I forgot how to spell Badger.....  so we had to cover that bit up. When we hung our sign up, Mary realised that I also didn't know how to spell Innocent either so she made a quick repair with her writing stick.  Mary hung our sign on the DEFRA sign but hen we got into dreadful trouble. 

The security men shouted at me and Mary and told us that we had to move it as someone complained.  I think I know who it was: a Huwoman with tidy black hair who had a mouth that looked as if she had been eating lemons.  She definitely doesn't like Badgers and she scowled at me when I waved at her.

Another man asked if we had heard the news that morning because Badgers are now being blamed for undermining the roads. Mary said, "Badgers were there first!". DEFRA is very clever at making Badgers seem evil creatures determined to undermine the fabric of British society.  I wish we had someone as good at publicity on our side.  

Mr Gove was very busy coming and going this week and he had lots of friends with him.  He went and bought his own lunch in a bag from Itsu.  They sell Seaweed and Fish and Noodles. 

As you might have noticed, Noodles are very like worms..... so Badgers would probably like them.

He stopped and said "Hello" three times.  Mary was in a bad mood and I had to keep her temper under control reminding her that if she did something naughty like spit at Mr Gove then she might go to prison.  She told me that she was thinking of cursing Mr Gove- she is a bit of a witch you see, but witches don't like to do harm, even to Badger Killers like Mr Gove.  I do wonder how he sleeps at night with all that blood on his hands and on his conscience. Perhaps, though, he is just stupid and it is the people in DEFRA who are feeding him lies about Badgers and he is not able to think for himself. 

I did hear one article on the radio this week about the last white Rhino somewhere dying.

Of course, that is very sad, especially when they are being killed because stupid Chinese doctors say that their patients must have rhino horns to give them erect penises.  As many of you may recall, male Badgers do have bones in that part of their anatomy so they don't have trouble in that department.  I suppose that we should count our blessings that Badgers aren't bigger Animals with bigger appendages or that would be yet another spurious reason for killing us.  (Mary said the word Spurious and although I don't  know what it means, I think it makes me sound clever..)  On hearing that news about the Rhino Mary emailed the PM show on Radio 4 and said why are they worried about a white Rhino when our own Conservatory Party was wiping out tens of thousands of our British Badgers. How soon will it be before we will be mourning the last Badger in England?

But two lovely things happened.  A Human came up to me and said, "I'm on your side" and asked me to look in his briefcase.  You'll never guess what I saw in there- A BADGER!   I think DEFRA will now instigate a bag search to see who is on Betty's side and is secretly keeping a Badger safe in their bags..    Remember when I went to Man Chester and hid in a bag?  That seems such a long time ago... when I was full of hope....

Another Human approached me and said that he would like to adopt one of my cubs.  he went off to get his lunch but never came back- I wonder if the security cameras heard what he said and culled him?

Mr Gove and all the other politicians have started their holidays now so Mary is thinking of not going to DEFRA tomorrow but instead going to Downing Street to meet the Tourists.  The Tourists love taking pictures of me and sending them all around the world.  Mary says that this will embarrass the Government so is worth doing even though there are some dodgy people who hang around there, but I reminded Mary that there are also lots of Police Officers too and they always look after me especially since I helped them keep an eye on a Dodgy Character. 

Oh! and another lovely thing.  Spring is coming and we saw flowers and birds and sun and warmth and that makes us all feel happier.  It also means that the Cubs can come outside to play in the warm evening and begin to feed themselves.  

Night night everyone.  Happy days!

Betty 🐾🐾

DO NOT Engage with the Badger

After all the snow it was good to get out of the sett and stretch my limbs and have a good claw scratch on the local trees.  The cubs took their first look at the sky today and are so excited to get out and about. But as soon as the heavy rain began they started to complain and rushed back into the warmth of our underground home.  Here is a picture that Chris Packham took of a badger in the snow:

Chris Packham is a true Badger Lover and many of my Human friends marched with him last year against the killing of Badgers- and Foxes too.  Here he is at a protest:

He is such a brave man to speak out for wildlife even though it sometimes gets him into trouble with the BBC.  Here he is with a Badger friend:

I only wish that more Celebrities would speak up for Badgers, especially now that matters have become so much worse. 

When my Huwoman friend Mary took me to a Badger Group meeting last week we were both struck by the big black cloud that hung over the room. (This is probably another "Metaphor" as it wasn't a real cloud of the sort that rain comes from but a cloud that makes people sad). Everyone was very unhappy and then Nikki told us that DEFRA has announced that Badger killing may be taking place in 5 more counties and 30,000 Badgers might be slaughtered this year.  Nikki was crying, Mary was crying and I was crying too for my babies.  All the other Badger loving Hupeople  in the room were sniffing too but I think they might have had colds.

Although I didn't really want to leave Brian, Blanche and Bud, I felt that I had to go down to DEFRA again to appeal to Mr Gove to stop this cruel and senseless policy.  Badgers are not responsible for Bovine TB- Cows are!  So, on Thursday I went down to London for the first time since our protest party and took up my usual position. 

 Lots of DEFRA staff were very pleased to see me back and so many of them said Hello.  One Huperson said the staff had been an instruction from DEFRA Senior Management which said, "Do not engage with the Badger".  I thought this was very funny.   Perhaps they are worried that I, Betty Badger, will show them the error of their ways or perhaps I might make the staff revolt.  I know that many of the staff are on the Badgers' side but they, too, feel powerless to act.  

One lovely thing happened.  Someone had left a beautiful red rose by the tree where I normally stand.  I am hoping it was from the man who I call Buddha who no longer works for DEFRA but was wise and kind and we had long chats about meaning and love and other stuff.  I do hope that he is happy in his new life.  Here is a picture of a rose, but the one I found was even nicer than this:

I really don't know what we Badgers and our Human and Huwoman friends can do to stop the Badger Killing but I will have a Very Hard Think this week.  Please feel free to send me your ideas.

Night Night, Betty  🐾🐾

Betty's Party at DEFRA

I was so excited on Wednesday night that I just couldn't sleep.  You know how it is when you invite friends to a party and you are worried that no one will arrive?  I thought that my worst fear was realised when I arrived at DEFRA on Thursday morning and I was all alone except for all the Cubs who came with me.  The Police had arranged some fencing outside DEFRA to keep my friends under control.  Here I am being kept under control and feeling very alone...

If you look carefully, you can see my 3 Cubs on the left of the fence, and you can see ginger Bud in the middle.  That picture was taken by a lovely young Human called Joe. 

Then more Humen and Huwomen and Badgers began to arrive.   Here are some pictures:

 They brought lots of banners with them

Some of the Hupeople dressed up like Badgers

Some of them made lots of noise and used horns to make their voices louder.  One Human blew a whistle but I didn't like that much because it hurt my ears. I thought the Humans were singing but I was told it was called chanting and they said things like, "Mr Gove, Stop the Cull" and "NFU Shame on You" .

I was told that Mr Gove and DEFRA are in the pockets of the NFU- the National Farmers union- and Mr Gove "dances to their tune"!  I have a bit of difficulty with that concept as I just cannot picture Mr Gove and DEFRA dancing in  farmers' pockets, but I was told that this is a "Metaphor".  What people are saying is that the rich farmers of the NFU can influence Mr Gove and the Government because they give the Conservatory Government lots of money.  Mr Gove was at the NFU conference on the day before our little get-together, so it does make me think...  Oh and the new Huwoman who has just become the leader of the NFU  hates Badgers, so I am very worried about that. This is Minette Batters the new NFU Huwoman

She farms Cows and kills them for meat then blames Badgers when they get diseases. I must keep an eye open for her...

I don't really understand politics because Badgers don't have politics.  We live together in big setts underground with lots of generations.  We get born, we mate, we dig holes, we have Cubs and we eat Worms and peanuts (and other stuff I won't mention...) .

In the country where we live, we have 2 main Political groups.  The Conservatories and the Labours. The Conservatories don't seem to like Animals very much and a lot of them like hunting Foxes, and killing Pheasants and Badgers.  But we must mention the Blue Badger group who are Conservatories who do want the Badger Cull to stop. The Labours seem to like Animals a bit more and their leader is Jeremy who is a vegetarian and doesn't even eat worms! He is opposed to vivisection, foie gras, fur farming, hunting, the Badger Cull and wild Animals in circuses. He sounds like a nice Human. This is Mr Corbyn:

Although I am not a political Badger I am very happy that the Labour Animal Rights Group came to our get-together.  They had a very nice sign:

Mr Gove did come to his DEFRA office when we were having our protest and he did say hello to us all.  Some people shouted at him when he was leaving on his way to Chequers to talk about BREXIT.  He got chased to his car by a Badger, but not me because I was busy looking after my Cubs.  

We had four very clever speakers who talked about the wrongness of the Badger Cull.   Two of them were from The Badger Trust, Peter and Dominic,  and a Human called Tom who is taking legal action against the Government, and a Labour Party Animal loving Human called Padraig.  

I am so glad that we had our get-together to show how much Hupeople care about the Badger folk.  Although it was a very cold day lots of good Hupeople came to support Betty and her cubs and I have made lots of new friends. 

Badgers:

Hupeople:  I really want to thank all the lovely people for coming, including Tom and Jane and Nikki and Heather and Frank and Chris and Marge and all the others who were so lovely and kind and brave. 

I was going to go back to DEFRA on Thursday but it looks as if we will be snowed in, so I will probably stay at home in the sett and keep the Cubs warm and well fed.

That's all for now.  Night night, Betty 🐾🐾

PS if you don't want your photo here please writ e comment in the place below and I will take you out