Betty gets Assaulted

Hello Betty Fans, I want to tell you about Hope, Harassment and Heroes.

So much going on that we have been too busy to write anything. We have three whole DEFRA days to tell you about. Mr Gove features in our stories.

Do you remember my Invitation? Well, some lovely Hupeople came to spend the whole day with me.  Oh, they love Badgers and they came from the West Country where DEFRA is Kill-Culling so many of our kin.  They are so sad and do everything they can to save their Badger friends but horrible Humen with flash-bang sticks tempt the Badgers at night with peanuts and then they shoot them.  Some other lovely Badger friends came too from other places bringing big banners. Here are some pictures of my friends who came to support  me:

It was especially sad because is it rained and it rained and it rained.  My fur got so heavy that I could hardly stand up and I could ring water out of my paws. They all stood bravely in the monsoon conditions.  But perhaps it was a good thing because Mr Gove came out and felt so sorry for us that he stopped for a chat under his HUGE National Trust Umbrella.  One of the Huwomen, Hazel or Ali. spoke to him about the Badger Kill-Cull and asked him for an appointment with me as I have been doggedly (Badgerdly) hanging around outside DEFRA for two years.  He said, yes, he was aware of Betty and yes, he will see me within the next two months!  WOW!  Isn't that wonderful?

Mary is so excited about meeting Mr Gove that she has had several dreams about him.  In one of them he wasn't very nice and spoke Political Platitudes.  In the other he was lovely and said he would stop the Badger Kill-Cull.  I don't like to remind Mary that it is me, Betty, that Mr Gove wants to meet and not her   Mary wrote a long letter to Mr Gove confirming our  appointment and giving him my solution to the problem of Cow TB. I hope he has time to read it.  It is My solution .  I wonder if we should bring him a present when we see him; some worms perhaps or some peanuts.

Last week I had another lovely Badger friend called Susanna who stood with me and Mary all day.  She handed out lots of leaflets and we had chats and got to know each other.  Mr Gove smiled at us again.  I hope Susanna comes again but she had to take a day off work to be with us; what a generous person.  She loves animals and doesn't eat them; even worms!  She took some nice pictures of me:

This week at DEFRA was not so good because we had some problems.  A background problem was that it was very hot and me and Mary felt unwell.

At Smith Square a man yelled at us saying that Badgers are "the worst predators in the countryside " and then ran away up the stairs into DEFRA Nobel House.  Mary asked him to come and talk about it but he ignored her and ran away.  He was clearly a coward. I tried to reassure her that he was jealous because Badgers are actually the Best predators in the  countryside- even the foxes get out of our way  

Things got worse when we moved from Smith Square to Great Peter Street.  That was where a Human threatened to shoot me a few weeks ago.  This week a Human shouted at me and hit my face. We were very scared and Mary began to cry because she gets upset when Hupeople are aggressive particularly when they are drunk and irrational. I got drunk once when I ate lots of rotting apples.  I felt very ill afterwards... This is a picture from the internet oracle of an angry drunk Human, but of not our Human in case he gets revenge:

But two lovely heroic Human Badger friends came to our aid and saved us from the nasty angry Human.  They stood by us and calmed the Human down and called the security Hupeople and kept us safe.  We are so  grateful for their kindness.  One of them, who wants to remain anonymous, said he had to protect Betty Badger because she is "an institution".  I thought an institution was where you put sick Hupeople but apparently it also means "a custom or tradition that has existed for a long time and is accepted as an important part of a particular society".

Betty is an Institution of DEFRA.  

But that wasn't all.   When we went round to 2 Marsham Street we noticed a bicycle with a big bag on it attached to a railing .  I have heard all about Bombs so I was very scared and tried to get Mary to take me home.  But the security Human called Bob was very brave and put his life at risk to save us.  When the Human who had left is bike returned  Bob gave him a very firm telling off.

We saw Mr Gove again today but he  is very preoccupied with preparing to be in the race to be the next Prime minister now that the Cupboard (or is is the Cabinet?) has nearly destroyed Mrs May and they want to replace her.  Mr Gove is always very neat, but today I think he had a new suit on and he was beautifully groomed with not a hair out of place.  He didn't speak to me today because he was hurrying off to a meeting.  Mary said that his chance of being the next PM would not be enhanced by being photographed talking to a Badger. Although apparently it is OK to be pictured with a Cow.....  

or a dog.....

On the subject of dogs a very sad thing happened.  Do you remember the homeless Pimlico Dog? We saw him today wandering along Marsham Street.  We ran down the road trying to help him because he looked tired and thirsty.  Then we heard that he was with a "rough looking man" so he had a friend but, sadly, he was so thirsty that he was drinking out of the Home Office Moat that has Chlorine in the water.  Mary will be getting help for the Dog.

Mary wants to tell you that she still has 4 chickens, She has achieved this by spending her life savings on electric fences and cages and by staying awake all night worrying and getting up every time she thinks she hears something.  I think the chickens will be the death of her.  She put her new expensive night camera out and has discovered that foxes wander around her garden all night.  They have their cubs now so have to feed them so she understands why they ate her chicken.   She said she might as well get more chickens now to improve the cost benefit ratio.  I said that I could only see the cost and little benefit to having chickens if she doesn't eat their eggs- or even give them to me.  She says they make her laugh; there hasn't been much evidence of that lately!

When Mary put out her night camera she discovered that I have a new Badger friend.  Here is a picture of us playing together in her garden along with one of the foxes.  His name is Bertie Badger and I think we might mate soon.  I will never forget my old mate Brian but a Badger has needs....

Just as we were leaving to go home today we met a Human who came to talk to us about Badgers and Squirrels.  He had a packet of peanuts in their shells and he was on his way to feed the Squirrels.  One who is called Cyril the Squirrel likes him so much  that he sit on his shoulder to eat nuts.  DEFRA wants to kill Grey Squirrels but he thinks we need lots more in London as there are so many parks and not enough Squirrels to go round.  What a happy loving Human and a positive note to finish on.

Night Night,

Betty 🐾🐾🐾